


a picture is worth a thousand words

by charliejones4505



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Abuse, Artist Harry, Depressed Harry, Depressed Harry Styles, Harry Styles Loves Louis Tomlinson, Louis Tomlinson Loves Harry Styles, M/M, Mute Harry, Mute Harry Styles, Punk Harry, Punk Harry Styles, Suicide, Suicide Notes, sixth form AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-29
Updated: 2021-01-29
Packaged: 2021-03-12 12:02:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29010231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charliejones4505/pseuds/charliejones4505
Summary: Louis is the new kid, and he is intrigued by the enigma of Harry Styles,Will Louis be too late in saving Harry from his own demons?and does love always conquer all?
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson
Kudos: 7





	a picture is worth a thousand words

**Author's Note:**

> TRIGGER WARNINGS: SUICIDE AND ABUSE
> 
> This is a complete work of fiction, and by no means reflects the personalities of the characters mentioned.
> 
> That aside, please do leave kudos, and comments as anything you have to say improves my writing.

×͜×

Louis slung his backpack over his shoulder, and took a deep breath, trying to slow his racing heartbeat. Today was the day. Holmes Chapel secondary. A new start to a brand new life, Louis was ready, of course he was. He totally did not feel like he was about to collapse and die on the spot. Louis slowly stepped into the building, his legs feeling like jelly. He made his way to reception, as the head teacher wanted to meet him to make sure he was okay. What would Louis say? “I feel like I might die or cry.” He’s not sure that will cut it at his new school, they would definitely bully him if he collapsed on his first day.

He managed to get through the conversation with the head teacher without projectile vomiting everywhere. He thought that was a win for his first day.

He managed to miss form time for the day which he was quite glad about, his first lesson was art, which he was actually quite looking forward too, it was one of the A level subjects he was able to choose, which therefore got him quite excited. He managed to find the classroom with ease as the school wasn’t actually that big, although he wasn’t sure he would be ready to throw his map away for a week or so.

He was about to enter his classroom, when a broad shoulder smashed into his, and entered the room in front of him, Louis looked up, ready to start getting angry at whoever barged in to him, just because it was his first day did not mean he wasn’t prepared to get angry at someone.

When his breath stopped, this time not from nerves, but from the beautiful man that had strode into the classroom. Louis could tell he was beautiful, more than beautiful, he didn’t think there were enough words in the English dictionary to describe the beauty of the man in front of him. He had long brown curly hair that fell past his shoulders, the curls framing his face, making him look like a painting, he had a pale complexion, and the brightest green eyes Louis had ever seen, it was like a forest was growing in his eyes.

Louis was immediately shaken out of his trance from the green eyed boy, when the teacher stepped in front of the door, Louis blinked up at her, she smiled at him, and he felt his heart slow to its regular pace. “Hi you must be Louis, I’m Miss Edwards and I will be your art teacher.” Louis felt himself relax at her kind words, may be this new school won’t be so bad.

When he entered the classroom following the teacher, he looked around for the seat he was told was next to a boy named “Niall” Louis had no idea who this was. He saw one empty seat next to a boy that was waving both of his arms in his direction.

He presumed this was Niall.

He walked over to the seat and saw Niall smiling brightly at him. “Hi my names Niall” Louis smiled at him as he started unpacking his things “I’m Louis” The teacher started explaining what they needed to do by the end of term, and just let them do it. That is why Louis loved art, although he wasn’t the best at it, he loved having the creative freedom to make something truly beautiful.

As they started getting on their work Niall turned to Louis and said “So have you made any friends yet?” Louis shook his head “no this is my first lesson” Niall’s eyes lit up, “you can be friends with me and my friend Liam if you like” Louis found it endearing that they were in year twelve yet Niall was still asking if they wanted to be friends like they were in year one, Louis if course said yes, and they agreed to meet at lunch, as Louis had teachers he needed to talk to at break.

When lunch rolled around, he spotted Niall at one of the tables in the canteen with another person, who had brunette hair, and in Louis’ opinion he looked kind of like a large puppy. He slowly approached Niall who was waving his arms again.

He seemed to do that a lot.

Louis set his bag on the floor and smiled at Niall, he then saw a hand being thrusted in His face “Hi I’m Liam, said the boy next to Niall. “I’m Louis” as he shook his hand.

They got on like a house on fire; they all got on really well. “So” Louis asked “who should I talk to who should I avoid, there’s always some of them.” Niall and Liam looked at each other, obviously thinking of the same person. “Harry Styles” They both said in unison, “Who is that and why?” Louis asked “He’s in our art class” Louis mouth went dry, please don’t let it be- “He’s the curly haired guy?” FUCK. “Oh why should I avoid him?” Louis asks, genuinely curious in the reply, Niall is the one that speaks first, big surprise. “He’s been here since year seven, but he has never spoken to anyone.” Louis furrowed his eyebrows confusion etched onto his face, he knew that wasn’t the whole story by the way Niall’s face paled, however he continued with the narrative “what do you mean he’s never spoken to anyone” “exactly that” Liam replied “no one’s ever heard him speak, not even the teachers.” “Weird.” Louis responded. For some reason Louis wanted to find out more about the enigma of Harry Styles. However he didn’t think that Niall and Liam would be very happy about that.

×͜×

The rest of Louis’ day was completely boring. He seemed to only have art with Harry, which Louis would be lying if he said that didn’t disappoint him. He was determined to find out more about him.

The next few days rolled completely like that, the same thing happening every day, which evidently meant that nothing happened each day. Until Friday. Friday was always Louis favourite day of the week. It meant that the weekend was soon, and the weekend was the best part of the week in Louis’ opinion. He had art today, which also made the week a lot better, starting and ending the week with double art, made Louis happy. He walked in the art class, and stood with his mouth hanging open, in his seat, sat Zayn. Now Louis didn’t have a problem with Zayn, he knew he was friends with Harry, but it was the fact that Zayn was sat in his seat next to Niall. Louis pouted, and walked over to the table, Niall turned to him and said, “Hi mate, sorry do you mind if I sit with Zayn today? I’m sure there’s somewhere else for you to sit?” Louis huffed but reluctantly agreed. The class was nearly ready to start, so most of the seats were taken, but Louis scanned the crowd anyway, deep down hoping the seat he was thinking of wouldn’t be taken.

It wasn’t.

Louis slowly walked over to the boy in question. He set his bag on the desk, and sat down and he took a deep breath.

“Hi Harry” He was met with silence, but he wasn’t really sure what he expected, he spent the time before the art class started studying Harry further. He noticed he had tattoos covering his arms and neck, he wandered how he didn’t notice them before; maybe because he was too busy staring at his face. Maybe. He also noticed that the boy had piercings as well, one through his eyebrow, a nose ring and a lip ring, also multiple lining his ears.

Louis wasn’t complaining.

The teacher then entered the room, getting started with the lesson. Louis spent the entire lesson either staring at Harry or talking to him, in hopes that he would reply.

He never did.

×͜×

It was finally the weekend and Louis was ecstatic, he could finally do nothing. After all that was what weekends were for obviously. Well he thought that would be the case until he got a text from Niall asking if he wanted to go to a party on Saturday. How could Louis say no?

Louis arrived at the party at about 9:00pm and it seemed everyone else was arriving then too. He entered whoever’s house it was and immediately searched for the blonde Irishman. After getting himself a bottle of beer he found Niall dancing on a pool table, he hated to say that even after knowing Niall for about a week; he wasn’t surprised by the blondes’ actions. He then saw a pair of tattooed arms reach through the crowd and manage to get Niall off the table carefully even with the amount of alcohol Niall had consumed. He saw a mop of curly hair taking Niall out the back door. **_Harry_**. Louis followed their direction, still not really knowing anyone and wanting to make sure Niall was okay.

Louis was confused, if Niall kept calling Harry weird why was he helping Niall? Also where was Liam, shouldn’t he be here? Louis has so many unanswered questions.

He found the back door and went out to see Niall crouched over a bin with harry rubbing his back. Niall slowly stood up turned to Harry and smiled “Thanks Hazza for always looking after me.” Louis looked on confused. Hazza? Always looking after him? Obviously they knew each other, but then why does Niall say he is weird?

Louis came into view, and Niall immediately hugged him, vomit still on his t-shirt but Niall didn’t seem to mind as he mushed his face into Louis neck. Niall kept whispering in his ear about how much he loved him, and Louis just smiled at him fondly. Harry started to prise Niall off of Louis and then Niall clung to Harry legs wrapping round his waist like a Koala bear. “Hazza are you taking me home?” Harry nodded at Niall still not saying a word. As he took Niall through the back gate, Louis followed, not wanting to stay at the party if he didn’t know anyone else.

He saw Harry push Niall into the back seat of a black Range Rover. He must be loaded, Louis thought. Louis slowly approached Harry and touches his shoulder, Louis didn’t notice the way Harry flinched and tensed at the touch of the smaller boy. “Would it be okay if you took me home too?” Harry nodded and walked round to the driver’s seat, as Louis climbed into the passenger seat. Harry pulled out of the House and started driving down unfamiliar roads; he presumed he was taking Niall home first. Harry pulled up to a basic suburban house, and then made a wait motion to Louis as he slowly dragged Niall inside. Whilst he was sat in the car waiting for Harry, he was pondering.

Harry seemed to be really nice to Niall and take care of him, yet Niall seemed to be disgusted whenever he spoke about Harry. Also why doesn’t Harry speak, he’s never said a word?

When Harry returned to the car, Louis smiled at him, Harry didn’t return the gesture, but Louis didn’t mind. Harry pulled out of Niall’s house and gestured towards the satnav for Louis to put in his address. “Why don’t you talk?” Louis asked, he had enough of being in the dark, he wanted to know why. No surprise to Louis, Harry didn’t say anything. Louis huffed “What is your deal, I’m sick of you not saying anything!” Louis was almost screaming at Harry by the time he had finished, he was so distracted by shouting at Harry, that he hadn’t realised they had pulled up to Louis house and that Harry was sat at the wheel tensed. Yet he still didn’t open his mouth. Why?

×͜×

Louis wasn’t sure what kept drawing him back to Harry Styles. He was extremely attractive Louis could give him that, but he has never just been interested in people because they are attractive. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t speak, that must be it. Right? That’s what Louis has convinced himself.

×͜×

Louis was walking home. It was probably about 1:00am, he wasn’t sure what he was doing out this late, his mum was going to murder him. However the fresh air was a nice distraction from the thoughts spiralling around his head.

He hadn’t realised how far he was walking until he didn’t realise where he was.

Wherever he was, it was rough. Now Louis didn’t want to be rude, but whoever lived round here, he knew he didn’t want to socialise with. He also knew that he didn’t want to stay here for any longer than necessary.

Speaking of not wanting to socialise, he walked passed a particularly rough house, and he heard shouts and lots of smashing of bottles, Louis wanted to stop and see what was going on, be he also didn’t want to dwell on something that wasn’t his business. He looked at the house where all the commotion was coming from, and he saw an old beat up ford focus, but also a really nice range rover that seemed really familiar.

Where did he know that car from?

He couldn’t quite figure it out.

He started listening more to the shouting he could hear from inside the walls of the house. “All you are is a fucking punk who doesn’t speak!” Then another smash was heard, Louis presumed it to be a bottle. “See I hit you with a bottle and you don’t even say anything you’re not normal!” Louis flinched at those words, even though they weren’t aimed at him, he could imagine how he would feel if they were. He just felt bad for whoever was inside that house, he could only imagine how they felt.

Louis then slowly started making his way home, he checked his phone.

2:13am

He’d been stood there for over an hour? He knew that they say time flies when you’re having fun, but he definitely wasn’t having fun. He started sprinting back to his house, with the help of google maps, he still wasn’t one hundred percent sure where he was, but he would try and never visit it again.

He turned the corner in hopes that he would see the familiar road that his house was located on, he released air he didn’t realise he was holding in his lungs. Home. Even though his mum would be angry, he was so grateful that his mum wouldn’t be angry like the man he heard on that road.

He unlocked the door to silence, he knew his mum was in due to the lights still being on in the kitchen, he walked into the kitchen, and he saw his mum stood there holding out a cup of tea with a smile on her face, Louis looked at her sceptically but he still took the cup of tea. “Where were you? Its 2:30 Louis” He sighed, “I went out for a walk and then I got lost.” She hummed, “Okay I’m letting you off, only because we have only just moved.” Louis sighed in relief, and went upstairs to sleep.

×͜×

Monday rolled around too quickly in Louis opinion. It was now week 6 of living in Holmes chapel, and week 5 of him being at Holmes chapel comprehensive. He feels like time had been stretching out; however time had also been speeding away from him, as he had one more week until half term, which Louis couldn’t wait for, one week of relaxation and freedom.

However he still had one more week of school left, starting with double art, which his new seat is now next to Harry, which he wasn’t complaining about, but he just wanted him to say one word, and Louis is getting increasingly more frustrated by as the weeks go by, however he can admit that he probably hasn’t been the nicest about going about it.

When Louis walked in to his double art lesson, he immediately makes a beeline to his seat next to Harry. Be nice he keeps chanting to himself as he turns to Harry and smiles. He notices he is wearing sunglasses inside. But he decides not to comment on it. “So Harry where do you go at lunch? I would like to sit with you if that is okay?” He knew it was a big stretch to his first few weeks of being there when he yelled at Harry, but he was trying his best. Harry ripped out a piece of paper from his notebook, and quickly scrawled across it and handed it to Louis:

_The oak tree behind the school, don’t tell anyone_

Louis wasn’t sure he knew where the Oaktree was, but if it meant finding out more about Harry, then he would take it.

×͜×

Lunch seemed to roll around really slowly, Louis was bouncing in his seat, Niall was looking at him weirdly. “What?” Louis asked, “You’re acting weirdly.” Niall stated. Louis then started shifting around in his seat uncomfortably at the gaze Niall was showering upon him. “So” Niall continued, seemingly dropping the subject, much to Louis relief. “Liam and I are going to Lidl at lunch, do you want to come?” Louis froze. He couldn’t, he needed to see Harry, he needed to know what Harry was going to tell him. “Uhhh, I- I- I-“ Louis stuttered “I can’t” Niall raised his eyebrows “Why?” He questioned. “I’ve got somewhere I need to be.” It was then that the teacher dismissed the class, Louis sighed in relief, he could kiss the teacher right now. He immediately grabbed his bag and rushed out the door, not even waving goodbye to Niall. He looked on with shock written on his face.

He exited the maths building and started searching the exterior of the school, looking for this oak tree. He realised that he probably could have asked Niall where it was, but it was too late now.

He was walking behind the science block when he saw it.

**_Him_ **

There he was. Harry Styles. Stood leaning against the oak tree, with a cigarette hanging off of his lips. He was stood there in all his ethereality. Louis started walking towards the tree; he smiled at Harry, as he stubbed his cigarette out on the tree and turns to Louis.

Louis inhaled, “So, are you finally going to talk?”

Harry deflated. Louis didn’t take that as a good sign.

Harry pulled out what looked like a laminated business card, Louis looked at him confused, Harry then extended his tattooed arm to him, giving him the card.

_Hi my names Harry Styles, and I am mute therefore I will not talk, you have probably been given this if you ask me to talk, unfortunately that won’t happen, I’m sorry, thank you for understanding._

_-Harry_

Oh. OH. All the moments over the last few weeks had flashed through Louis mind, when he was screaming at Harry to talk, and this whole time, Harry just sat there and took it. Louis felt guilt bubbling in his stomach, and winding up his throat

“Harry I’m so sorry I-“ Harry raised his hand to silence Loui*s. He sat against the oak tree and beckoned Louis to come and sit next to him. Louis complied. Harry pulled out an all-black spiral notebook and a pen from his bag, and set them down on the grass. He opened the notebook to a fresh page and wrote

_You can ask me anything and I’ll write my answers down._

Louis smiled; this is what he had wanted since day one, to finally get to know the enigma that is Harry Styles.

“I’m going to start off simple, because I don’t know you very well yet.” Harry nodded and smiled. “What is your favourite colour?” He saw Harry’s eyes light up as he quickly scribbled down _blue, like the colour of your eyes, what about you?_ Louis blushed, this wasn’t the way he had imagined Harry complimenting him, but he would take it. “Mines green, like the colour of your eyes.” He saw Harry’s cheeks turn a dusty pink shade, which was nothing in comparison to the fire that was ablaze on Louis face due to Harry. “Okay Louis whispered, why do you have so many tattoos and piercings?” Harry freezes, thinking for a moment before writing _I don’t feel comfortable answering that, can you choose a different question?_

Louis nods, and they go on like this for the whole 40 minute lunch time, Louis gets up off of the grass, and turns to Harry and says “Same time tomorrow?” Harry smiles dimples popping out as he nods his head.

×͜×

Friday rolls around quicker than Louis would have liked, which is ironic considering on Monday he couldn’t wait for half term to get there. That was before he started talking to Harry. Well he spoke and Harry wrote. He managed to split his time between Niall and Harry to keep them both Harry, and break he would sit with Liam and Niall in the canteen and at Lunch he would sit with Harry under the Oaktree. He wasn’t sure what they would do when it started to get cold, but Louis didn’t focus on that for now.

He luckily had double art first, which as two hours of communicating with Harry, which made a bubbly feeling form deep in his stomach. He walked in and smiled at Niall and Zayn as he walked past them, and he sat next to Harry, he got out his sketchbook and started drawing as he waited for Harry to pass him a note, it was the usual routine. However this time he was given an A3 envelope with the words _open when you’re at home_ , Louis smiled and looked up at Harry, who was already looking at him.

Louis started to chat to Harry as they drew, just like they always did, Louis often spoke about his mum, and what he ate last night, and what he did. Harry had written to him once that he enjoys listening to Louis talk as he listened.

Over the last week they had become close friends quickly, and they knew a lot about each other, Louis noticed that Harry never told him about his family, however Louis never pushed him, he was just happy about anything he could find out about Harry.

×͜×

Louis rushed home from school; he couldn’t wait to see what Harry had put in the envelope for Louis. Louis found it strange that he had only properly known Harry for a week yet he felt like he had known him his whole life. He barely even said hi to his mum as he ran past her and upstairs to his room. He couldn’t wait. It had been a struggle not to open it in school, but he promised Harry, and he wasn’t about to break it now.

He was sat at his desk with the envelope in front of him, he inhaled and exhaled and then opened it.

He wasn’t sure what he expected.

But it wasn’t what he got.

He saw a note on top first:

_Louis._

_Thank you for being the first person to see me for who I am and not for being the freak who doesn’t talk_

_-H x_

Louis felt like he could cry from that note alone. For the boy of few words, Harry evoked so much emotion into everything he wrote. However it was the thing underneath the note that made Louis eyes water.

It was a painting.

Not any painting.

It was a painting that Harry had done of the oak tree that they had sat under every day, with two boys sat underneath it sharing a notebook; Louis immediately recognised it to be him and Harry. In that moment Louis realised how much he cared for the boy with no words. But Louis didn’t know what to do with that. He couldn’t jeopardise his friendship with Harry.

He was admiring the painting when he saw a number scrawled along the bottom right along with Harry’s signature. His phone number. Louis smiled to himself, and immediately entered the number in his phone and sent him a message. Harry replied almost immediately.

 **Louis:** Hi, this is Louis thank you for the painting xxx

Was three kisses too many? Louis wasn’t sure. He couldn’t take it back now.

 _Harry:_ Hey Louis, glad you liked it :) x

Louis breathed a sigh of relief; Harry didn’t seem to care at Louis use of excessive kisses. Thank god.

They messaged back and forth for hours, not talking about anything particularly interesting, but to Louis it meant the world. It was that day that Louis realised he loved Harry.

Louis Tomlinson loves Harry Styles.

He wanted to shout it to the world.

×͜×

Louis didn’t know how he managed it, but he was on a walk, he had headphones in and he managed to end up in the same street as last time. When he came past the house, he stood and stared at it. Almost as if staring at it would mean that he could see inside the house. It was when he stared at the house, and started to hear the shouting once again. “I’m sick of you, I can’t stand looking at you get out of my fucking house!” Louis felt like he had frozen in place, would he finally be able to see who this mystery person is? He heard the slam of a door, and a person coming towards Louis, who had subconsciously brought himself closer and closer to the house. He saw a mess of curls and a pale lanky body striding towards him.

**_Harry._ **

Louis mind flashed back to the time he shouted at Harry for not talking and at how tense he looked. His dad. In that moment Louis sounded exactly like his dad, and he in that moment Louis hated himself

×͜×

Harry heard the blaring of his alarm in his ear, as he turned it off as quick as possible, hoping and praying that it hadn’t awoken his dad.

It had.

Harry heard the smashing of a fist against his bedroom door, the force alone smashing a hole the size of his dads fist into it. He swung open the door and strode over to Harry, who was trying to show as little emotion on his face as possible.

“What the fuck was that little stunt!” He was screaming in Harry’s face, he still didn’t flinch. He couldn’t. Otherwise it would be much worse; he could already smell the alcohol lingering on his father’s breath, puncturing Harry’s body every time he spoke.

Harry’s dad gave him a black eye before school.

Harry still didn’t speak a word.

Too scared of what would happen if he said something wrong.

×͜×

It was that las day of school when Harry realised he loved Louis. He realised that whatever damage his dad caused. Louis comfort could fix it, even if only for a short while. He knew it couldn’t last. He knew he couldn’t get attached, He would just get hurt. There was only one option.

×͜×

Louis couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw Harry walking out of that house.

The Harry that he loved and cared for. Was being so hurt by someone who should love him unconditionally.

Louis felt sick to his stomach.

He felt so blinded by the sympathy and pain that he felt for the curly haired male, that he didn’t even see Harry getting into his range rover and driving away with tear stained cheeks.

Louis went home that night with a heavy heart, and Harry Styles on his brain.

He wanted to go after the boy, but he thought that he wanted space.

Oh how he would regret not chasing after him.

×͜×

_LOCAL TEEN JUMPED OFF A CAR PARK LAST NIGHT AND KILLED HIMSELF_

×͜×

_I’m here,_

_I know what im going to do, I don’t want to leave, but I have no other choice, I can’t carry o, not like this, its this or a life of pain and misery. I’m sorry but I can’t do that._

_The sun is starting to rise, it looks so beautiful, just like you. I wish I could have told you all of this when I was alive, but we both know what I’m like with talking._

_It will always be you, I could never love someone else_

_I’m so thankful that you have come into my life._

_You are my ray of sunshine, in the clouds that ensnare my sky._

_That painting wasn’t just to show you how much I love you, but also show you how much you mean to me aside from love._

_Ask anyone about that oak tree, and they will have no idea where it is._

_Only you and I know._

_It will be you and I until the end_

_Until my end or yours,_

_It will always be you and I,_

_not even the god’s above can separate the two of us._

_It’s always you Lou_

_It’s always been you, and it always will be._

_I’m so thankful that I have met you._

_I will always love you,_

_For today, tomorrow and for eternity._

_It’s always you._

_And for one last time, goodbye and goodnight, I’ll see you when I see you, but promise me one thing._

_Don’t make it soon._

_I love you_

_-H xx_

×͜×

Harry stepped out of the car, his heart still at a steady pace, he was ready, he knew it was going to happen.

He had prepared himself for this day for years.

The day he would finally be happy.

He drove his car up the car park to its highest story, he took out a pen, paper and envelope an started writing.

×͜×

He was leaning over the edge, peering at the ground. This was it.

×͜×

He had done it. He felt like he was flying.

He was well and truly happy.

His final thought?

**_Louis Tomlinson_ **

×͜×


End file.
